The title of today's blog was actually the subject line of an email advertisement I received from WalMart.com. When the email was opened it revealed ads for such things as heart shaped diamond pendants, teddy bears, diamond stud earings, chocolate gift sets wrapped in pink packaging, gift baskets, a crystal engraved heart shaped paperweight, and oh, I almost forgot... some lingerie.
So today I would like to talk about Valentine's Day. Let me tell you how I REALLY feel. Valentine's Day is probably my least favorite holiday, and one that really gets my hackles up. In the weeks leading up to it we are bombarded with emails, and radio ads (and if we watched TV I am sure we would also be bombarded by commercials) that are designed to urge men to do something great and special for their woman for Valentine's Day. Usually these suggestions are expensive such as diamond jewelry, dozens of roses, romantic dinners etc. I rarely hear commercials urging women to get gifts for their men, and if there is a gift for men mentioned it is almost always lingerie. (Most women I know wouldn't consider lingerie to be a gift for herself.) Does it seem like there is some kind of imbalance here? The man is supposed to give the woman expensive jewelry, flowers, chocolate, and dinner out...(Preferably all of these, right? or he will be seen as a schmuck who doesn't appreciate his woman) and in return she will (if he is lucky) get some new lingerie. Sounds like prostitution to me.
Valentine's Day tries to program men to spend money on material things to show their love. And it programs women to expect that, and to feel like their men are inferior if they don't do all the right things for that special day. I say, down with Valentines!
So I know you are all wanting to ask the question...do we celebrate Valentine's Day? Well, the kids get to buy their superhero or other types of valentines for their classes, and we usually get a simple box of candy for each of the boys. I think its fine to have a holiday to celebrate love, I just hate the way it has been twisted into a commercial guilt trip for the entire country. My idea of a great Valentine's Day is having a nice dinner at home. I might go out of my way to make something special that we will ALL enjoy, and we spend our evening together. That is it. We have had the discussion in years past about the evils of this holiday and the pressure it puts on men to do something that can often be out of character for them. My husband knows that I don't want flowers, or jewelry from him, and although chocolates are always welcome, I will happily forgo them on that day. Do I hate getting flowers? No, of course not! Although I will admit that they certainly don't last long. Flowers are beautiful, but I don't care if I NEVER get flowers for Valentine's Day. Do I hate jewelry? No, but I am a practical person, and I would rather see our money spent on practical things. Jewelry as an expression of love doesn't make much sense to me...because you can't take it with you when you go.
So all you ladies that have a man who seems unappreciative of you year round but showers you with gifts at Valentine's...maybe you shouldn't be so impressed with that. That is like having to be reminded to get your spouse an anniversary gift. Of course, if you are happy with your one day a year of being spoiled, then by all means, continue on.
And you ladies that have a man that shows you that he loves you on a regular basis, but perhaps falls a little short when it comes to the worldly expectations of a great Valentine, well I say, count your blessings. I don't care if I never get flowers, diamonds, or other showy gifts. I will take what I have any day, and that is a man that is truly my partner in every way.
I love you D!
So today I would like to talk about Valentine's Day. Let me tell you how I REALLY feel. Valentine's Day is probably my least favorite holiday, and one that really gets my hackles up. In the weeks leading up to it we are bombarded with emails, and radio ads (and if we watched TV I am sure we would also be bombarded by commercials) that are designed to urge men to do something great and special for their woman for Valentine's Day. Usually these suggestions are expensive such as diamond jewelry, dozens of roses, romantic dinners etc. I rarely hear commercials urging women to get gifts for their men, and if there is a gift for men mentioned it is almost always lingerie. (Most women I know wouldn't consider lingerie to be a gift for herself.) Does it seem like there is some kind of imbalance here? The man is supposed to give the woman expensive jewelry, flowers, chocolate, and dinner out...(Preferably all of these, right? or he will be seen as a schmuck who doesn't appreciate his woman) and in return she will (if he is lucky) get some new lingerie. Sounds like prostitution to me.
Valentine's Day tries to program men to spend money on material things to show their love. And it programs women to expect that, and to feel like their men are inferior if they don't do all the right things for that special day. I say, down with Valentines!
So I know you are all wanting to ask the question...do we celebrate Valentine's Day? Well, the kids get to buy their superhero or other types of valentines for their classes, and we usually get a simple box of candy for each of the boys. I think its fine to have a holiday to celebrate love, I just hate the way it has been twisted into a commercial guilt trip for the entire country. My idea of a great Valentine's Day is having a nice dinner at home. I might go out of my way to make something special that we will ALL enjoy, and we spend our evening together. That is it. We have had the discussion in years past about the evils of this holiday and the pressure it puts on men to do something that can often be out of character for them. My husband knows that I don't want flowers, or jewelry from him, and although chocolates are always welcome, I will happily forgo them on that day. Do I hate getting flowers? No, of course not! Although I will admit that they certainly don't last long. Flowers are beautiful, but I don't care if I NEVER get flowers for Valentine's Day. Do I hate jewelry? No, but I am a practical person, and I would rather see our money spent on practical things. Jewelry as an expression of love doesn't make much sense to me...because you can't take it with you when you go.
So all you ladies that have a man who seems unappreciative of you year round but showers you with gifts at Valentine's...maybe you shouldn't be so impressed with that. That is like having to be reminded to get your spouse an anniversary gift. Of course, if you are happy with your one day a year of being spoiled, then by all means, continue on.
And you ladies that have a man that shows you that he loves you on a regular basis, but perhaps falls a little short when it comes to the worldly expectations of a great Valentine, well I say, count your blessings. I don't care if I never get flowers, diamonds, or other showy gifts. I will take what I have any day, and that is a man that is truly my partner in every way.
I love you D!
2 comments:
I like to see it, passionate about consumerism!! If my wife were to judge me for my Valentine's day gifts, I would have been long gone. REally the day has great potential for celebrating love and expressing true feelings, but it has been overtaken by the all mighty dollar.
Amen! For me, it's all about the time. And I expect that my husband will show me that he loves me by spending time with me year round, not just on one day a year.
As for preferred Valentine's Day gifts, since Sans is reading over my shoulder, I'd like to go on a hike, kid-free, when it is not freezing outside.
Oh, wait - you got me that for our anniversary! I love you, Sans!
Post a Comment