Being a stay at home Mom with five boys aged ten and under, I sometimes crave time by myself. I love my husband and I miss him when he is at work, but sometimes I just can't wait for him to get home so I can get out of the house and hear myself think!
My days seem to be filled with little people following me around the house, asking me questions, or asking me to do or get something from them. If I am sitting there, doing nothing, and completely ready to help them in whatever way they need to be helped, then they somehow manage to leave me alone. However, if I am trying to read a book or a blog, do dishes or laundry, cook dinner, go to the bathroom, or take a shower then I am suddenly the most needed person on the face of the earth. Sometimes I just want to run screaming down the street (carrying a good book of course) to find some peace and quiet where I can just relax for a little while.
D understands that I get to feeling a little bit crazy sometimes. He knows when I say that I need to run to the store to get some milk, that he shouldn't be surprised if it takes me two hours to come home. I take the cell phone along, just in case and spend a lot of time wandering around the store with a glazed look on my face.
The other day I went to Fred Meyer to get some fixings for #2's lunch. Usually the boys eat school lunches, but he was going on a field trip to the zoo, and needed a packed lunch from home. I took him along with me, and we picked out some lunch meat, and a few other things for his lunch. We got in line and I found myself standing behind a lady that goes to our church. I don't know her well, but we recognized each other enough to smile and say hello. She was widowed a year or two ago when her husband died of a terminal illness. I started thinking as I watched her standing there in line, about how lonely she must be now that her husband is gone. I am not sure if they have children or not, but if they do the children are all grown and moved out. After we paid, #2 and I went to the car, and I saw that she was parked across from us. It was fairly late, around 10 p.m. and as I watched her load her groceries into her car, I thought about her going back to her empty house alone. She looked at me, and we smiled at each other. Suddenly my own alone time didn't seem quite so important to me. I realized that what I have now...the chaos, the close quarters, the lack of personal space...will change as my boys get older. Later on in life they will find ways to be out of the house, and eventually they will grow up and move away. Someday, I may find myself with more alone time than I want. I drove home with a different outlook that day. I had a new appreciation for my husband and for the precious time we get to spend together. Of course there will still be days when I just need a little time by myself. I think we all need that sometimes, but I hope that my me time can be just a little bit shorter, so that I can spend that much more time with the husband that I love dearly, and those sweet boys that are going to grow up faster than I want them to.
My days seem to be filled with little people following me around the house, asking me questions, or asking me to do or get something from them. If I am sitting there, doing nothing, and completely ready to help them in whatever way they need to be helped, then they somehow manage to leave me alone. However, if I am trying to read a book or a blog, do dishes or laundry, cook dinner, go to the bathroom, or take a shower then I am suddenly the most needed person on the face of the earth. Sometimes I just want to run screaming down the street (carrying a good book of course) to find some peace and quiet where I can just relax for a little while.
D understands that I get to feeling a little bit crazy sometimes. He knows when I say that I need to run to the store to get some milk, that he shouldn't be surprised if it takes me two hours to come home. I take the cell phone along, just in case and spend a lot of time wandering around the store with a glazed look on my face.
The other day I went to Fred Meyer to get some fixings for #2's lunch. Usually the boys eat school lunches, but he was going on a field trip to the zoo, and needed a packed lunch from home. I took him along with me, and we picked out some lunch meat, and a few other things for his lunch. We got in line and I found myself standing behind a lady that goes to our church. I don't know her well, but we recognized each other enough to smile and say hello. She was widowed a year or two ago when her husband died of a terminal illness. I started thinking as I watched her standing there in line, about how lonely she must be now that her husband is gone. I am not sure if they have children or not, but if they do the children are all grown and moved out. After we paid, #2 and I went to the car, and I saw that she was parked across from us. It was fairly late, around 10 p.m. and as I watched her load her groceries into her car, I thought about her going back to her empty house alone. She looked at me, and we smiled at each other. Suddenly my own alone time didn't seem quite so important to me. I realized that what I have now...the chaos, the close quarters, the lack of personal space...will change as my boys get older. Later on in life they will find ways to be out of the house, and eventually they will grow up and move away. Someday, I may find myself with more alone time than I want. I drove home with a different outlook that day. I had a new appreciation for my husband and for the precious time we get to spend together. Of course there will still be days when I just need a little time by myself. I think we all need that sometimes, but I hope that my me time can be just a little bit shorter, so that I can spend that much more time with the husband that I love dearly, and those sweet boys that are going to grow up faster than I want them to.
1 comment:
It amazes me to the nth degree when I read posts like this one, and find my own thoughts and even experiences echoed. How often I've run to my car the second the girls were in bed, and pealed off to town to "get milk" but really, to "get sane".
Neil also knows that these quick trips quickly become long ramblings through the grocery store aisles, enjoying the blissful quiet.
And I too am periodically reminded of how much I cherish my time with my sweetheart. And this is one of those times. Thank you.
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