When I started out blogging, it was just going to be a way to have a writing outlet. A fun diversion for myself that didn't involve me going shopping and spending a lot of money that I shouldn't be spending. It was going to be a way to keep family and friends somewhat informed on my life without actually informing them of anything at all. I don't know what I was thinking. I thought that if I at least wrote something every so often, then at least I was writing SOMETHING, which is more than I have managed in the last ten years since I got married and then became a Mom.
I will tell you that I wanted to be a writer for almost as long as I can remember. As an 8 year old I wrote journal entries about wanting to be an author, and I never really let go of that dream even though the things I wanted to write about changed over the years.
Now I am in a rut. When I started out writing this blog, about 7 months ago, I loved writing in it. I didn't care what other people thought of it, it made me smile. Sure, some of my posts were off the wall, and a few were even slightly amusing. I LOVED being a blogger. I constantly had ideas of things to write about. My posts were long, and sometimes opinionated. They weren't necessarily anything high quality, but that didn't matter because I just loved writing again.
Then I became a blog reader. I admit to checking most of the many blogs in my favorites folder several times a week, sometimes even daily. I enjoy reading the blogs of others. Through my perusal of blogdom I have discovered that there are many family oriented blogs out there written by capable, talented people. Of course there are many blogs out there written by foul-mouthed idiots as well, but I have distinguishing tastes and I only frequent certain neighborhoods of the blogosphere. Has reading other people's blogs hurt my own blog writing? I think it has. I think that realizing that there are many smart, capable and even very funny people out there that have coherent and well put together blogs has made me realize the mundane qualities of my own blog. At least lately.
At the start I was enthralled with it. I suppose it is like the tides and has an ebb and flow quality. Right now I am sailing away from the shores, staring back at what I once had and felt, and knowing that I can't get back to it right now.
I am not going to give up on my blog. But I think that I will continue to write less often in it. Only about 4 people read it anyhow, so I don't think it will be too missed. I just can't seem to get the old me back. Not just the old blogging me, but the old me in general. I am not even sure who that person was. I have enough of a struggle just getting out of bed every day, let alone trying to write something coherent and clever on a blog that goes largely unread. Maybe once spring is here I will feel some new green leaves sprouting out in my mind and my writing will come back...maybe not. For now I am just going to wait this out. I hope you are still here when I get back.
I will tell you that I wanted to be a writer for almost as long as I can remember. As an 8 year old I wrote journal entries about wanting to be an author, and I never really let go of that dream even though the things I wanted to write about changed over the years.
Now I am in a rut. When I started out writing this blog, about 7 months ago, I loved writing in it. I didn't care what other people thought of it, it made me smile. Sure, some of my posts were off the wall, and a few were even slightly amusing. I LOVED being a blogger. I constantly had ideas of things to write about. My posts were long, and sometimes opinionated. They weren't necessarily anything high quality, but that didn't matter because I just loved writing again.
Then I became a blog reader. I admit to checking most of the many blogs in my favorites folder several times a week, sometimes even daily. I enjoy reading the blogs of others. Through my perusal of blogdom I have discovered that there are many family oriented blogs out there written by capable, talented people. Of course there are many blogs out there written by foul-mouthed idiots as well, but I have distinguishing tastes and I only frequent certain neighborhoods of the blogosphere. Has reading other people's blogs hurt my own blog writing? I think it has. I think that realizing that there are many smart, capable and even very funny people out there that have coherent and well put together blogs has made me realize the mundane qualities of my own blog. At least lately.
At the start I was enthralled with it. I suppose it is like the tides and has an ebb and flow quality. Right now I am sailing away from the shores, staring back at what I once had and felt, and knowing that I can't get back to it right now.
I am not going to give up on my blog. But I think that I will continue to write less often in it. Only about 4 people read it anyhow, so I don't think it will be too missed. I just can't seem to get the old me back. Not just the old blogging me, but the old me in general. I am not even sure who that person was. I have enough of a struggle just getting out of bed every day, let alone trying to write something coherent and clever on a blog that goes largely unread. Maybe once spring is here I will feel some new green leaves sprouting out in my mind and my writing will come back...maybe not. For now I am just going to wait this out. I hope you are still here when I get back.
6 comments:
We'll still be here when you do post again. Don't over commit yourself to the blog...remember that you did it for fun. Keep it that way. If it gets to be a chore, then your writing will read like a chore.
I love your blog and hope you keep it up. Just don't beat yourself up when you don't write or don't know what to say.
When you get the urge to throw your fingers on the computer keys again, we'll be waiting!
Blog when you want to with what you want to say. I'll wait for when you have a new entry. Blogging should benefit you and not be a competition. I started my blog to be a type of online journal for myself and if it interests other people, than I'm happy.
I'll be waiting for the next new entry. Take your time and be happy with what you want to say. :)
I know what you mean. Being funny or peppy or smart is hard! It is intimidating to read other blogs. It is easy to get blogged down. I blog more in my head than I do on the computer.
Most blog readers don't post comments. you have four commments, so you must have more readers. Do what you love and you'll remember who you are. Tell us about it if that is part of who you are, we love hearing from you. And as for writing what people won't read... I spent 5 hours on an essay test yesterday that one person will read. I spent about 20-30 hours on a research paper that one person will read. That is what I've done this week. My life revolves around writing things that one person will read. I keep a blog to practice writing and put it out there so that there is at least the possibility that more than one person will read it. I've recently started writing about something that i love and my readership seems to have increased (with a little help from fatty)
YOu've got at least 5 readers!
I must say, I'm not a big laugh-out-loud person, but I do at some of your posts. I love your off the wall comments! Just keep it light and write when you want. There's no point in doing it if you don't love it. (As you can tell from how often I write in my own blog!)
I, too, am looking forward to spring. I am sick of 20 degree weather. I don't know which is worse: booger-freezing cold or snot all day misty cold like you get in the northwest. You can't really enjoy the outdoors in either.
Even if you don't write, I know you'll keep having great ideas in your head. Keep them to yourself or share them, it's up to you - but I sure like to hear them!
Thanks for the supportive words. I will still try to write once a week if I can think of a topic that sparks my interest.
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