Baby Blue Eyes
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Monday Memory: The Poet
The Poet
It seems I have spent endless hours
With restless pen and empty page
Trying to write with heartfelt pow'r
A lifetime of unuttered rage
Emotions that I can't sort out
That crowd my mind for some release
Until all I can do is shout
At Heaven's sky to give me peace
But pick the pen up once again
To breathe life into ink and page
Fed by countless tears and pain
Impassioned by an endless rage
Twisted words that strain to rhyme
And turn my angry soul to prose
Seem to fade and die with time
As falling petals from a rose
That leave me here back at the start
With empty page of senseless song
That comes straight from my poet's heart
But never stays with me for long
Please don't critique this too harshly...after all, I wrote it 18 years ago. I'm actually tempted to do some editing...
Friday, January 23, 2009
Run, run, run...
I used to be a runner. You wouldn't know it to look at me, but it's true. I never did high school track or cross country, but I ran almost every day.
After school I would get home, change into my sweats and go for a run. I usually ran two to three miles each time. My typical run was to run back to my high school, watch what was left of volleyball or track practice and run home. During basketball season (winter) I did not run because I was on the team.
I wasn't running to get in shape. Running was something different for me. I think I was running to get away from things emotionally: running away from a family that I thought didn't like me (I was wrong of course, but we all know that teenagers aren't always rational people) and running to get away from my own thoughts.
Running was hard work for me. The physical pain of running kept me from thinking about anything else. I would choose a goal, usually an easy one, like a certain power pole or street sign and I would make a deal with myself to run until I got to that point, and then I could slow down, or walk. Then when I was close to my goal I would set a new goal and continue running. Doing things in small steps made it seem easier to me than just running the whole distance at once, even though the end result was the same. Setting smaller goals meant that if I got too tired, or couldn't cut it, I had a reprieve. It gave me permission to be less than perfect.
Sometimes I think that it would be a good thing to apply my rules of running to other goals in life. You might want that big goal of saying you ran the whole three miles, lost that 20 pounds, or managed to get the whole house clean at once. The truth is, for me at least, that biting off a large goal like that almost always ends in failure. However, if I break it down into more attainable goals I am much more likely to succeed.
Just look ahead to the next power pole and keep running. If you have to slow down and rest a little after you reach one of your smaller goals it doesn't mean the larger goal is unattainable. Keep moving. Keep trying. Don't give up.
After school I would get home, change into my sweats and go for a run. I usually ran two to three miles each time. My typical run was to run back to my high school, watch what was left of volleyball or track practice and run home. During basketball season (winter) I did not run because I was on the team.
I wasn't running to get in shape. Running was something different for me. I think I was running to get away from things emotionally: running away from a family that I thought didn't like me (I was wrong of course, but we all know that teenagers aren't always rational people) and running to get away from my own thoughts.
Running was hard work for me. The physical pain of running kept me from thinking about anything else. I would choose a goal, usually an easy one, like a certain power pole or street sign and I would make a deal with myself to run until I got to that point, and then I could slow down, or walk. Then when I was close to my goal I would set a new goal and continue running. Doing things in small steps made it seem easier to me than just running the whole distance at once, even though the end result was the same. Setting smaller goals meant that if I got too tired, or couldn't cut it, I had a reprieve. It gave me permission to be less than perfect.
Sometimes I think that it would be a good thing to apply my rules of running to other goals in life. You might want that big goal of saying you ran the whole three miles, lost that 20 pounds, or managed to get the whole house clean at once. The truth is, for me at least, that biting off a large goal like that almost always ends in failure. However, if I break it down into more attainable goals I am much more likely to succeed.
Just look ahead to the next power pole and keep running. If you have to slow down and rest a little after you reach one of your smaller goals it doesn't mean the larger goal is unattainable. Keep moving. Keep trying. Don't give up.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
The Plague
We are all suffering from illness here. D and Baby B got it around the same time, and who can resist a cute little baby, even when she is coughing and hacking all over you? Consequently, not only do I have it now, but ALL of the boys have it too. They just can't seem to stay out of her face.
Here she is in all her watery eyed misery. That little bit of white in the top right corner is a tissue clutched in her hand, because there is nothing funner to this almost 8 month old than ripping up tissue. (Yes, we always supervise the ripping of tissue. The pacifier is present to prevent eating of the tissue, and a parent is always watching like a hawk for her to try to eat it anyway.)
On another note, we have had some lovely DRY weather this week. Yesterday it got up to a balmy 54 degrees outside, and it was sunny as well. So in spite of our coughing, weakened conditions, we headed to the beach. Hopefully you will be happy about that when Wednesday comes and I don't have to subject you to pictures of my front yard again.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Okay, okay, here's the recipe...
It's not really anything that special. I have seem many fancier recipes for mac and cheese out there. Maybe my sibs just like it because my Mom has always just made the boxed kind...
To be honest I don't follow an exact recipe for mac and cheese. I eyeball, I don't measure. In the past people have asked for the recipe, so I measured (sort of) to get a general idea and hopefully it worked well for them.
Mac and Cheese
1/2 C of butter or margarine
1/2 cup flour
Milk
Cheese
Cooked macaroni noodles (make sure you salt the water you cook them in. That is the key to good macaroni) (I usually use one to one and a half pounds of dry pasta)
In a sauce pan melt the butter or margarine. Stir or whisk in the flour and cook until it becomes bubbly. Keeping over medium heat, add one cup of milk and whisk to combine. As it cooks it will thicken. Add more milk about a half cup at a time and stir and heat in between adding until you get a sauce that is not too thick, but not too thin (I really need to measure the exact amount of milk sometime). You want a sauce that is thick enough to adhere well to the noodles, but not gloppy. If your sauce is too thick you can add more milk, if it is too thin you can cook it a little longer and it should thicken up. Once your sauce is the right consistency, add some slices of cheddar cheese (or grated cheddar would work too-I just hate washing the grater) I have also used colby jack, or other yellow cheeses. I don't recommend mozzarella as it doesn't tend to melt into the sauce well and causes it to get stringy. I never measure the amount of cheese I use, I just add some and stir it to melt until the sauce starts to look a little more yellow. I would say that 4 oz would be a good amount, but more doesn't hurt. Make sure you stir it until the cheese is completely melted into the sauce. Pour the sauce over the noodles and stir to combine. We often just dish it up at this point and eat it, but you can also put the macaroni in a pan, grate some more cheese over the top and sprinkle some breadcrumbs over and heat it up in a 350 degree oven for 15 to 20 minutes. If I am feeling extra fancy I will stir a teaspoon or two of dijon or stone ground mustard into the sauce for a little extra kick.
It may or may not need salt when you are ready to eat it. That depends on the amount of salt you put in the water when you cooked the pasta. As a rule I don't salt the sauce because everyone likes a different level of saltiness.
This recipe will feed our family of eight and have some leftovers...so you can feel free to cut the measurements in half if you want less.
See? It's nothing that special. We just like it, so there it is! Let me know if you try it, and if it works for you.
To be honest I don't follow an exact recipe for mac and cheese. I eyeball, I don't measure. In the past people have asked for the recipe, so I measured (sort of) to get a general idea and hopefully it worked well for them.
Mac and Cheese
1/2 C of butter or margarine
1/2 cup flour
Milk
Cheese
Cooked macaroni noodles (make sure you salt the water you cook them in. That is the key to good macaroni) (I usually use one to one and a half pounds of dry pasta)
In a sauce pan melt the butter or margarine. Stir or whisk in the flour and cook until it becomes bubbly. Keeping over medium heat, add one cup of milk and whisk to combine. As it cooks it will thicken. Add more milk about a half cup at a time and stir and heat in between adding until you get a sauce that is not too thick, but not too thin (I really need to measure the exact amount of milk sometime). You want a sauce that is thick enough to adhere well to the noodles, but not gloppy. If your sauce is too thick you can add more milk, if it is too thin you can cook it a little longer and it should thicken up. Once your sauce is the right consistency, add some slices of cheddar cheese (or grated cheddar would work too-I just hate washing the grater) I have also used colby jack, or other yellow cheeses. I don't recommend mozzarella as it doesn't tend to melt into the sauce well and causes it to get stringy. I never measure the amount of cheese I use, I just add some and stir it to melt until the sauce starts to look a little more yellow. I would say that 4 oz would be a good amount, but more doesn't hurt. Make sure you stir it until the cheese is completely melted into the sauce. Pour the sauce over the noodles and stir to combine. We often just dish it up at this point and eat it, but you can also put the macaroni in a pan, grate some more cheese over the top and sprinkle some breadcrumbs over and heat it up in a 350 degree oven for 15 to 20 minutes. If I am feeling extra fancy I will stir a teaspoon or two of dijon or stone ground mustard into the sauce for a little extra kick.
It may or may not need salt when you are ready to eat it. That depends on the amount of salt you put in the water when you cooked the pasta. As a rule I don't salt the sauce because everyone likes a different level of saltiness.
This recipe will feed our family of eight and have some leftovers...so you can feel free to cut the measurements in half if you want less.
See? It's nothing that special. We just like it, so there it is! Let me know if you try it, and if it works for you.
Sometimes you can't go back...
When I was a kid I would beg my Mom to let me buy hot lunch on the day when they served macaroni and cheese with little smokies. It was my all time favorite school lunch. One of my favorite dinners was mac and cheese with hot dogs cut up in it. Hey, for a kid, that was culture!
Time passed. I grew older and began to appreciate other culinary delights. At some point I learned to make macaroni and cheese from scratch, and my enjoyment of the bright orange mac and cheese from a box was suddenly diminished.
Eventually I got married and had children of my own. Homemade macaroni and cheese is probably the most requested birthday meal at our house. I have even had my own siblings request it when they are coming to visit, it's just that good. I still buy the boxed variety on occasion because it makes a quick meal (although I admit that I frequently dilute it with chili to make it more palatable for the grown ups).
Today #4 stayed home from school with a cold, so I got down a box of mac and cheese to make for his and #5's lunch. There just happened to be some hot dogs in the fridge, and nostalgia got the better of me. Once that childhood favorite was right there in front of me, I couldn't resist having some. I should have let the fond memory live on in my heart. It just goes to show that sometimes you can't go back.
Time passed. I grew older and began to appreciate other culinary delights. At some point I learned to make macaroni and cheese from scratch, and my enjoyment of the bright orange mac and cheese from a box was suddenly diminished.
Eventually I got married and had children of my own. Homemade macaroni and cheese is probably the most requested birthday meal at our house. I have even had my own siblings request it when they are coming to visit, it's just that good. I still buy the boxed variety on occasion because it makes a quick meal (although I admit that I frequently dilute it with chili to make it more palatable for the grown ups).
Today #4 stayed home from school with a cold, so I got down a box of mac and cheese to make for his and #5's lunch. There just happened to be some hot dogs in the fridge, and nostalgia got the better of me. Once that childhood favorite was right there in front of me, I couldn't resist having some. I should have let the fond memory live on in my heart. It just goes to show that sometimes you can't go back.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Wordless Wednesday
First of all, let me say that I have not been taking many pictures lately. At least not any spectacular ones. Part of this was due to a lot of rain where I live. I did venture outside at risk of getting my camera wet to capture the shot below.
This is my front yard. It was 8 to 9 inches deep on this day. Anyone want to swim?
For this one, I am just wondering why boys always get the lashes. This is my 5 year old...Friday, January 09, 2009
Coasting...
Did you have a bike as a kid? I did. It was a beautiful thing. It was blue and white with streamers coming from the handlebars. That bike was probably my favorite childhood possession.
Back then, the general rule was "Come home before the streetlights come on." I spent a lot of time riding up and down the streets of our neighborhood. I loved to stand up and pump the pedals so I could work up to a fast speed and then coast along, sometimes taking my hands off the handlebars, feeling reckless and free. The sun was out, the wind was in my hair, and life was good.
Now that I am a grown-up I am finding myself coasting in a lot of areas of my life. Today, coasting means just sitting back and doing nothing, and when I do that my responsibilities tend to pile up around me and stress me out. One of the biggest ways I coast is to sit and stare at the computer. When I am at the computer my back is to the rest of the house, and I don't have to look at messes, dishes, or piles of laundry waiting to be folded. Coasting along, ignoring those responsibilities certainly doesn't make me feel free anymore.
I think I need to get back to those childhood roots. Looking back, coasting was a reward for the hard work of pedalling, so if I am going to enjoy the coasting I had better get to work.
Back then, the general rule was "Come home before the streetlights come on." I spent a lot of time riding up and down the streets of our neighborhood. I loved to stand up and pump the pedals so I could work up to a fast speed and then coast along, sometimes taking my hands off the handlebars, feeling reckless and free. The sun was out, the wind was in my hair, and life was good.
Now that I am a grown-up I am finding myself coasting in a lot of areas of my life. Today, coasting means just sitting back and doing nothing, and when I do that my responsibilities tend to pile up around me and stress me out. One of the biggest ways I coast is to sit and stare at the computer. When I am at the computer my back is to the rest of the house, and I don't have to look at messes, dishes, or piles of laundry waiting to be folded. Coasting along, ignoring those responsibilities certainly doesn't make me feel free anymore.
I think I need to get back to those childhood roots. Looking back, coasting was a reward for the hard work of pedalling, so if I am going to enjoy the coasting I had better get to work.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Wordless Wednesday: Happy Birthday K!
K aka #4 loved that plug. 
Somewhere around one his hair turned blonde and he hasn't looked back.
3 years old
He really wanted to be a Cowboy
Always willing to pose for the camera...
That smile is hiding his permanent teeth. He is growing up so fast!
That smile is hiding his permanent teeth. He is growing up so fast!HAPPY 7th Birthday K!
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